NEWSFLASH - that thing called...

My knuckles have been rapped by the boyfriend as i haven't blogged since April. This is always the way with me, i find i have more time and inclination to write when something's going wrong or i'm bored rather than when i'm happy and busy. The same happens when i try and keep diaries and journals. If anyone read them they would seriously think i was a depressed, suicidal loon - and i want to keep that a secret!

My best friend got married last month. It was a truly amazing day, one which i will never forget and i'm so happy that Hannah chose me to be part of it. It was very special. Unfortunatley i'm such a wet blanket that i cried at every available opportunity. But that's not news, that's just me and i've realised that me being a soppy cow is just part of my personality. I used to be made to feel stupid for my tears, told to suck it up or "here come the waterworks", the thing is when i'm emotional (and that's sad, happy, overwhelmed, angry) i express it through tears. I guess i can safely say that i'm not dead inside and that i'm very in touch with my feelings.

Something i have realised though, is eveytime i've cried recently (in the last six months let's say)it has been through happiness. I mean yes, i probably was a bit sad at saying goodbye to my parents and pets when they moved from the village i grew up in, to live in Portugal permanently. It's hard saying goodbye to a life that no longer exists. And it's hard knowing that they aren't where they always were. I guess in a way it feels as though my safety net has gone. But more than that, i'm so, so proud of my parents. They're so brave and i think they're a bit of an inspiration. They've made their dreams come true and they've worked damn hard to get where they are now. It's hard for them too, and i know not a day goes by without them thinking about their daughters and hoping we're safe.

And i am. Safe i mean. As far as i can be. So the tears are ones of joy really, and admiration.

I feel pretty settled at the moment. That could be down to the fact that i've had the same job for almost six months (and the same man) and i've signed up to another six months in Stokey. Or maybe i finally feel at home in London. Or perhaps now i've realised that London is my home. It's a nice feeling, but things are going to change. They have to. It's just the way the world works, and i'm not scared by that. On the contrary, i'm excited by it. Especially if it means moving in with the new man ;-)

I've got sooo much to look forward to this summer and most of it is down to him. I can't believe how lucky i am, to have snared a sexy South African dude who brings out only the best in me, who my friends and family love and who loves me. That's right, NEWSFLASH! I'm in that thing called Love! And it's great!!!

Bring it on!

Tonight i'm having a reunion with old work mates. The company that made me redundant last year in fact. The company only currently exists with two people and only until the end of the month. End of an era. Nice that we all still keep in touch though and there's no animosity there. I used to think that if my boss asked me back i'd be there in a heartbeat, but now i'm not so sure. I'm not exactly in a completely solid position right now but who is? I do know that i could go somewhere with this job though and i don't think i need to take any more risks with jobs.

I've got Saturday night planned with the girls. It has been a while as we're all so busy. Must say my time's been taken up with the new man, taken up willingly i might add. But i've also been busy going back and forth to Wiltshire for Bridesmaid duties. I have to be honest i didn't realise how much tooing and froing there would be, this being my first time and all. It'll all be worth it though i'm sure. Just to see two happy people vowing to be by each others side forever. That thought used to scare the bejesus outta me...but it doesn't quite so much these days. Take from that what you will! Perhaps i've just caught myself in a romantic unrealistic mood.

Summer is nearly here! Well, i guess we have to get Spring out the way first but still it is on it's way. And with it comes all manner of greatness. Festivals, BBQs, weddings, holidays, park life, cider in the sun. Smiles all round!

Bring it on!